Hello everyone and welcome to another edition of BREAKING NEWS. This rounds edition will be just as boring as last rounds. You have been warned.

Lets Begin…







Families and Union News





Loco go solo

Loco IU or IU Loco or just Loco… however you want to put it. The family who has been a member of IUs union for what seems like an age now. The family that is led by a Dusty yet surprisingly clean (or so they say) boss of TMB has this round taken Loco solo.

I contacted Dusk to ask here why it was decided to go solo this round. Here is a copy of the message I sent Dusk.


To Dusk:

Hello Dusk, A little birdie tells me that it is highly likely that you will not be joining IU's union this round. Care to comment on the matter?

TMB_Reporter
Not really expecting much but a classic ‘none of your business’ I waited for Dusks reply, which came very quickly.

From Dusk:

Go shoot the fucking birdie not only is it way out of order.. it feeds you bullshit on a huge scale don’t bother me again
Bullshit you say Dusk. I would have to disagree. My birdie informed me towards the end of the previous round that Loco going solo the following round was highly likely. And besides, he knows not to feed me bullshit. There are consequences ☺

Since Dusk wasn’t helpful I had to go back to my birdie who after running his own investigation managed to find out that there was a consensus within Loco that they are viewed by the rest of the game as a family that leaches ranks of IU. Because of this they decided to go solo to prove the rest of the game wrong.

I also received this from Harry.


From Harry_Potter
They don't like magicians and we smell. it could be grass is greener thing.
Moving on…

MBU join Warhounds

After joining Inner Circle last rounds, MBU have this round decided to join Warhounds. I sent out a couple of messages to a few select people but just like last round nobody got back to me. I guess they loved my speculation so much last round that they wanted me to do it again. So here goes…

My theory – After spending a round with Inner Circle, Viking Slap realized that nobody gave a fuck about his exploits from one place to another. The bitching by certain members of the inner circle also didn’t help. As a result of this, Viking Slap made an executive decision to leave and to join a union that would enjoy hearing about his exploits.

Will MBU be back with Warhounds next round?… I guess it depends on how long it takes for certain people to get bored of the ‘Greetings from (insert place here)…

Moving on…..


Southside go Union

After finally getting that family gold, Southside, led by the infamous Madd Maxx decided to go union. This was a surprise. I would have thought Southside would have attempted to defend their gold medal and prove that it wasn’t a one off. I sent out a few messages to members of Southside. The first response I got was from Will who wanted to know how long it would take for his panties to dry. A grown man who wears panties, I have nothing more to add here…

The second response I got was from Mad Dawg aka Big Sarge. Here is what he had to say…


From Madd Dawg:

Well SS has been always been an underdog, or maybe looked over as a threat. Last round we, as a family pulled together and brought home Gold. Some would be complacent and think that is good enough. SS leadership got together and thought what next. So now we started with basic 30 person family and decided to go union. We picked up a few new members and some old members came back.

I don't think I can speak for everyone but it is basically summed up like this: Is the risk worth the reward? Not really sure but it will be fun finding out.
Yes I believe we will all find out at Eor Sarge. As it stands Southside are currently second. Will they finish in the top 3 Eor? I guess time will tell…

Moving on…..


War News or Lack of



Loco and IC make peace

Loco deciding to go solo may have come as a surprise to some of you, but to those of us who are a little better informed it wasn’t. Loco and Inner Circle napping for the round however was a surprise to me. Even I, the great, the magnificent, didn’t see this one coming. The Nap was agreed within a few days of the round. After speaking to a couple of individuals I managed to confirm that the nap was for a round, or as long as Loco remain out of IUs union.

Interesting stuff. I wonder how Monkeykilla must be feeling right about now. It’s like his other half walking out on him and then blowing his arch enemy…Ehh.. well maybe not like that…
Moving on…



Jackie D Amico via Jimmy Finger vs Nameless

This round it wasn’t Jackie, rumor has it he didn’t have time, or ran out of turns, which ever you would prefer to believe, so he instructed his second in command, Jimmy Finger to initiate conflict with Nameless this round. Jimmy had built up 2 million dus and made his move around the 4 day mark. Up to that point Nameless, like everyone else had a shit ton of dus and had done fuck all with them. Jimmy ran through most of Nameless big builders. Nameless responded with hits on Inner Circle as you would expect.

I wonder how long the Jackie D Amico v Nameless conflict will last. This is the third round. I contacted a number of different people and here are the key things that the majority had to say on the matter…

1. Jackie doesn’t like being disrespected

2. Jackie has issues, he starts shit and gets butt hurt when he gets told to fuck himself

3. Nameless have a tendency to run their mouths

4. Nobody gives a shit

Moving on….


The Big and Small builds

Throughout this round there have been numerous big builds. And sub players have been building their dus without being hit by other players. Free players have also by and large been allowed to build dus without being hit.

What the fuck is going on here? Is everyone holding hands and singing kum by yah? I thought this was a mafia game? Why have you all turned into pussies?...

If it isn’t obvious, I am not happy. This is not no preschool game, it’s time for you all to get your shit together and make some hits. If not, then I will show you how it’s done. And believe me, you wouldn’t want TMB reporter building. I will fuck your shit up.

Hopefully things get back to normal next round and people you know, war one another.



Who will be taking the JP home?



Now I bet your all wondering what that magical entity known as the rotation has to say about who’s round it is. Well I can tell you that according to my handbook this round is supposed to go to 23. As we witnessed last round the rotation got his wish. But will that happen this round? Maybe or maybe not.. Lets see who the contenders are.

Player One: Babbo Bravo

The artist formally known as Daniele. Babbo Bravo currently has 3.8 million ops. He also has 2.3 million dus. He recently won a turbo round. With the way the round has gone it doesn’t look as if he will lose his dus this round let alone his ops. Could he grow a pair at Eor and take the JP home? Maybe…


Player Two: Tru

Tru didn’t make a move last round but with currently 2.6 million ops, maybe he will this round? He like Babbo Bravo is surrounded with players with JP experience and to his credit has been involved in JP wins himself. I have a feeling Babbo going is more likely than Tru but let’s see how it all pans out..


Player Three: 23

The infamous 23. If Dusk is the king of Loco surely 23 is the queen? Or is it the other way around, ehh I don’t know. Anyway, since his return to the game, I believe it was one years ago, 23 has not lost a round he has gone for. But I suppose that is not really impressive since well, he hasn’t really been challenged, ever. Will he be taking this rounds JP home? Probably… but remember, nobodies streak lasts forever. This could be the round. Maybe…



The Church of TMB, Nino finds stuff funny, RIP fake families…


The Church of TMB

Ladies and Gentlemen, the church of TMB has returned. Mr Worker founded the church once it became apparent to him that TMB was lacking a place of worship. Over the years the church has appeared and disappeared. I contacted Mr Worker to find out why. Here is what he had to say…

From MrWorker:

Hi I am on a mission to save as many souls as possible ahh
I understand Mr Worker, but why now? Why not last round? Why does the church keep disappearing and reappearing? Why do you only have one member? I guess it is speculation time so here goes…

My theory – Mr Worker founded the Church of TMB to not recruit souls but to fulfil his innate desires. What are these desires you ask? Well if you haven’t had a conversation with a drunk Mr Worker yet then you should consider yourself lucky. Nuff said….

I also messaged Beva to see if s/he could give some additional insight. Here is what s/he had to say…


From Beva:

Weee is gonnaaa bring peopleee to the reetttt PROPPAAA way of thinking OOOooooooooo PROPPPAAAA sheeiiitttt.
Moving on….

Nino is back and he finds something funny

Nino finds something funny. I wonder what it could be. Lets find out…

From Nino:

I Think its hilarious, everybody have become friends, now there is only looting and collecting left. Its more a Card club then a mafia game
I also find this funny Nino. I hope the killing gets back to normal next round. Perhaps it would have this round if you had ohh I don’t know, perhaps grown a pair and made some hits of your own. You do have 3.3 million du.…..

RIP Fake families

Over the past few months I have reported on a number of instances where certain individuals have set up fake families and trapped people in them. The most famous of these cases being the case of Patricia. Following this Storm made a rule amendment, which has now stuck. He reintroduced leaving families in order to protect those of you who are stupid enough to join such families. So I guess we will never again see (or at least for a while) a player being trapped in a family.

So yeah.. RIP fake families.

This is TMB Reporter….later…..


Note – This blog was submitted for publication on Day 7 of last round. We apologize for the delay in publishing this amazing blog.