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The infamous journey of a zeroed mafioso...

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  • Tusone_SU
    started a topic The infamous journey of a zeroed mafioso...

    The infamous journey of a zeroed mafioso...

    I was about noneofyourfuckingbusiness years old when I was first introduced to the game. My TMB best friend had founded Skidmark United during round 9 and showed me the way around round 11 or so. For nearly 3 years I played this game with him and always used the same nameÖ.because I had nothing to hide and wasnít a bitch.
    I stepped away from the game for about 10 years, although I periodically checked in to see if the flag was flying. About 4 rounds ago, I came back and hoisted the flag. The soiled undies were once again flying in TMB thanks to old friends and family. My TMB bff and boss Matty returned to the game as well.
    I was disappointed in the state of the game and horrified by the new rules. Collecting had become more important than hitting, and hitting had been reduced to an ineffectual practice. Ops hits had become exorbitantly expensive and a wholly useless endeavour. With 1.7m d units, the target I hit only resulted in 29k ops dead and their business maxed. My heart sank.
    However, keeping with the Skid motto of a round ended with dus is a round wasted, we built and hit with some enjoyment. However, we yearned for more. With that in mind, we hardened our resolveÖand our junk. It is still possible to do us. It is still possible to have our fun.
    Weíve been called assholes, multiís, idiots, crazy, Skids, Skidmark_UnitedÖ.you may have heard of us.

    This round started like any other in the MansionÖ.

    Day 1-3
    We logged in and began to build. Witty banter and good natured fuckery abounded in the boards. The FYUU flag was hoisted and friends and family ribbed each other like a condom, for their pleasure.
    Day 4-7
    Some invites were sent out to random people for a kip in the mansion, tomfoolery was had. We continued to build and had a bit of fun in the Turbo.
    Day 8
    The day started out normally. 800lb and I were wanting to get rid of the dus that had begun to taunt us with each passing day. Below are excerpts from our Family BoardÖas usual, read from the bottom upÖ






    800lbgorilla
    Batter up.
    You should be able to take him out now.

    Clutch
    Ranked 6 in Level 4, and 6 national.

    Currently in Palermo

    This mafioso got 10,000 operatives
    and 2,396,880 defensives

    posted20 hours, 8 minutes, and 21 secondsago
    : delete


    800lbgorilla
    His NW went up a bit, I'm 25 bil short to make a run on him.
    I've got a plumber here at the moment, damn water heater decided to go out yesterday.
    posted20 hours, 21 minutes, and 8 secondsago
    : delete


    Tusone
    Suiciding..
    posted20 hours, 43 minutes, and 0 secondsago
    : delete




    Tusone
    I had planned on suiting and letting you bat clean up
    posted20 hours, 43 minutes, and 14 secondsago
    : delete


    800lbgorilla
    Not sure if it would more effective to tag team or me to start it up with suiciding on him.
    What do you think?
    posted20 hours, 54 minutes, and 37 secondsago
    : delete


    800lbgorilla
    I really like the idea of Clutch and polishing off the rest of the family if we have the bandwidth.
    posted20 hours, 59 minutes, and 9 secondsago
    : delete

    Tusone
    So we go after Clutch. Do we want him, or the rest of his family?

    posted21 hours, 21 minutes, and 23 secondsago
    : delete


    800lbgorilla
    Even better, I haven't been blocked for far too long.
    posted1 day, 10 hours, 57 minutes, and 51 secondsago
    : delete


    Roughneck
    Clutch is a Snow flake ! Let's make em find a safe place and block us all hahaha
    posted1 day, 11 hours, 4 minutes, and 22 secondsago
    : delete


    800lbgorilla
    I'm down to hit Clutch but will need some range/car cash.
    posted1 day, 11 hours, 8 minutes, and 54 secondsago

    Tusone
    His family too
    posted1 day, 13 hours, 57 minutes, and 18 secondsago
    : delete



    Tusone
    Clutch looks like fun
    posted1 day, 13 hours, 57 minutes, and 27 secondsago
    : delete

    800lbgorilla
    Southside is looking nicely stocked.
    Warhounds hit Bobby but they don't have shit for DU's. Took what ops I could.
    posted1 day, 14 hours, 26 minutes, and 46 secondsago
    : delete




    Tusone
    Agreed though. We need a family or two to run through
    posted1 day, 14 hours, 30 minutes, and 25 secondsago
    : delete

    Tusone
    Iíll hit Matty before I waste duís...lol
    posted1 day, 14 hours, 30 minutes, and 56 secondsago
    : delete

    800lbgorilla
    We're creeping towards that wasted DU's point.
    Anybody in mind?
    posted1 day, 14 hours, 43 minutes, and 17 secondsago

    Apparently Roughneck was right. Clutch is a snowflake. Turns out his family is as well. (In the interest of honestyÖRoku took his beating like a champ). After a few messages back and forth with a crying Clutch, I was blocked. He also pre-emptively blocked 800lbgorilla. Such bitchery has not been seen by this Mafioso in a looooong time. It warmed my heart. Below are the messages in their entirety.

    from Clutch
    12 hours, 41 minutes, and 18 seconds ago.
    reply | reply to all | quote | block | delete
    To: Tusone
    CC: 800lbgorilla,

    Hide behind your cute messages all you want. Doesn't make any difference.
    There was literally no benefit for you guys to hit me.
    You guys made no money, no one from my family was hitting you, no one was talking shit ... and I know for a fact that you spent bought credits to build for those hits.
    You're obviously working for someone, or are just multis hiding in SM so that naps aren't broken ... either way that makes you a complete little bitch.

    Thanks for ruining the round for me. Really makes me want to continue playing and supporting the game ...

    In reply to:
    To: Clutch
    CC: 800lbgorilla,

    I did tell you the real reason, you are just either too ignorant to see it, or you donít believe it.

    If you donít see it, I canít fix stupid.

    If you donít believe it, then that is just sad and makes me even happier to have zeroed you. It also makes you an arrogant cunt with absolutely NO reason to be so.

    In reply to:
    To: Tusone
    CC: 800lbgorilla,

    If you have the balls to make those hits, then you should have the balls to say the real reason for them.

    In reply to:
    To: Clutch
    CC: 800lbgorilla,

    Such a philosophical question!

    Perhaps because you were there? No...thatís mountain climbing.

    Perhaps because we were bored? Elements of truth, but not THE reason.

    Perhaps we have an Oedipus complex! No...while you are a bit of a bitch, you donít strike me as female. Mommy issues remain unanswered I guess.

    I donít even think that monstrosity of an autobiography had much to do with it. (Although being a rankwhore is bad enough, you added illiterate attention seeker and that is just wrong!)

    I guess in the end it was because we felt like it.

    In reply to:
    To: Tusone
    CC: 800lbgorilla,

    Why would you guys hit me?

    The arrogance of Clutch is truly mind boggling. Thinking that we built just to attack HIM! LOL, motherfucker is an afterthought. We built all round to attack any one. We always have, we always will. We hit every big spender in the game in our time. Unions with more families than we had members. APO is nothing new. A family of people who play the game to rank.
    It speaks to the state of the game that a family with only a desire to hit people is a shock to a rankwhoreís system.
    You would think that the whining ended there. You would think that after taking his ball and going homeÖ.it would be the last of our fun at their expense. This family is a fucking gold mine though. A family friend logged in of his own accord, and did what he doesÖhe hit the only guy left in their family with 2m dus.
    More accusations of multis were bandied about. This family apparently has never done anything to warrant friends. Much less friends that enjoy hitting as much as ours do.

    from Norseman
    2 hours, 14 minutes, and 35 seconds ago.
    reply | quote | block | delete

    Your welcome, glad to contribute to some good entertainment.. however, we dont cheat with multis, maybe you should consider that as well

    In reply to:
    LOL!!

    You guys are a fucking gold mine! Thank you for making this round fun. Hitting you guys is like kicking a handicapped kid in the nuts...not challenging exactly, but still fun!





    from Norseman
    2 hours, 18 minutes, and 45 seconds ago.
    reply | quote | block | delete

    There you are.. out of turns on your multi? lmao

    Our inboxes were flooded with messages from people laughing, saying that they knew we would hit Clutch days ago, congratulating us on taking out a little cunt who it turns out lacks any kind of creativity, and apparently values turns over all else.

    Like I told you Clutch, we did it because we fucking felt like it.
    Last edited by Fornax; 09-19-2019, 01:55 PM.

  • IDC
    replied
    Just to clarify dirtynick of bh did the original dirtyclutch you mam just did every fam or member dirty by filling your internet medal set so please do us all a favor and not only quit but pls stop logging back in game

    Leave a comment:


  • Loki-
    replied
    "Too many toxic people"

    Leave a comment:


  • MickyKnox
    replied
    61h9nqUeX7L._AC_UL200_SR200,200_.jpg

    infamous
    Ranked 108 in Level 4, and 567 national.
    Currently in Los Angeles

    This mafioso got 252,879 operatives
    and 0 defensives

    This mafioso has 55,906 kill points



    last seen 1 day, 10 hours, 10 minutes, and 18 seconds ago.

    networth $507,388,017

    last attacked by Mooky


    12 hours, 35 minutes, and 48 seconds ago.
    Report Profile
    actually quitting for real now ... it's been a hell of a ride

    too many toxic people, back-stabbing friends, and cheaters to continue pouring time and money into this

    best of luck folks

    Leave a comment:


  • Tusone_SU
    replied
    Originally posted by Clutch View Post
    At the end of the day, you went out of your way and used bought credits to hit someone who didnít hit you, talk shit, threaten your family, or have any cash to steal.

    If anyone finds this kind of shit funny, then youíve got the IQ of a toaster.

    Half of the messages youíre claiming here are completely fabricated ... and you troll me for writing one of the most in-depth and polished blog posts in months ... but then make a low quality thread like this, just to get a little attention.

    Enjoy your 5 minutes of fame idiots.
    Itís sad that you think you still have credibility. Saying messages were fabricated and expecting anyone worth a shit to believe you is just sad.

    Even more insulting is the fact that you think your blog was well written. Call me a liar, say you kicked my ass...but donít call that drivel entertaining. You wrote about paint drying for 300 rounds.

    Leave a comment:


  • 800lbgorilla
    replied
    Reversed order to make it easy for our special needs friends to read:


    Skid Family Board:
    __________________________________________________ _________
    ******

    800lbgorilla

    We're creeping towards that wasted DU's point.

    Anybody in mind?

    posted1 day, 14 hours, 43 minutes, and 17 secondsago


    ******

    Tusone

    Iíll hit Matty before I waste duís...lol

    posted1 day, 14 hours, 30 minutes, and 56 secondsago

    ******

    Tusone

    Agreed though. We need a family or two to run through

    posted1 day, 14 hours, 30 minutes, and 25 secondsago

    ******

    800lbgorilla

    Southside is looking nicely stocked.

    Warhounds hit Bobby but they don't have shit for DU's. Took what ops I could.

    posted1 day, 14 hours, 26 minutes, and 46 secondsago


    ******

    Tusone

    Clutch looks like fun

    posted1 day, 13 hours, 57 minutes, and 27 secondsago

    *******

    Tusone

    His family too

    posted1 day, 13 hours, 57 minutes, and 18 secondsago


    ******

    800lbgorilla

    I'm down to hit Clutch but will need some range/car cash.

    posted1 day, 11 hours, 8 minutes, and 54 secondsago


    ******

    Roughneck

    Clutch is a Snow flake ! Let's make em find a safe place and block us all hahaha

    posted1 day, 11 hours, 4 minutes, and 22 secondsago


    ******

    800lbgorilla

    Even better, I haven't been blocked for far too long.

    posted1 day, 10 hours, 57 minutes, and 51 secondsago

    ******

    Tusone

    So we go after Clutch. Do we want him, or the rest of his family?

    posted21 hours, 21 minutes, and 23 secondsago

    ******

    800lbgorilla

    I really like the idea of Clutch and polishing off the rest of the family if we have the bandwidth.

    posted20 hours, 59 minutes, and 9 secondsago

    *******

    800lbgorilla

    Not sure if it would more effective to tag team or me to start it up with suiciding on him.

    What do you think?

    posted20 hours, 54 minutes, and 37 secondsago

    ******

    Tusone

    I had planned on suiting and letting you bat clean up

    posted20 hours, 43 minutes, and 14 secondsago


    ******

    Tusone

    Suiciding..

    posted20 hours, 43 minutes, and 0 secondsago


    *******

    800lbgorilla

    His NW went up a bit, I'm 25 bil short to make a run on him.

    I've got a plumber here at the moment, damn water heater decided to go out yesterday.

    posted20 hours, 21 minutes, and 8 secondsago


    ******

    800lbgorilla

    Batter up.

    You should be able to take him out now.




    Clutch

    Ranked 6 in Level 4, and 6 national.

    Currently in Palermo

    This mafioso got 10,000 operatives

    and 2,396,880 defensives


    posted20 hours, 8 minutes, and 21 secondsago

    __________________________________________________ __________



    Clutch Crying:




    To: Tusone

    CC: 800lbgorilla,


    Why would you guys hit me?


    *********

    In reply to:

    To: Clutch

    CC: 800lbgorilla,

    Such a philosophical question!

    Perhaps because you were there? No...thatís mountain climbing.

    Perhaps because we were bored? Elements of truth, but not THE reason.

    Perhaps we have an Oedipus complex! No...while you are a bit of a bitch, you donít strike me as female. Mommy issues remain unanswered I guess.

    I donít even think that monstrosity of an autobiography had much to do with it. (Although being a rankwhore is bad enough, you added illiterate attention seeker and that is just wrong!)

    I guess in the end it was because we felt like it.


    ******

    In reply to:

    To: Tusone

    CC: 800lbgorilla,


    If you have the balls to make those hits, then you should have the balls to say the real reason for them.

    ******

    In reply to:

    To: Clutch

    CC: 800lbgorilla,


    I did tell you the real reason, you are just either too ignorant to see it, or you donít believe it.

    If you donít see it, I canít fix stupid.

    If you donít believe it, then that is just sad and makes me even happier to have zeroed you. It also makes you an arrogant cunt with absolutely NO reason to be so.


    *******

    12 hours, 41 minutes, and 18 seconds ago.

    reply | reply to all | quote | block | delete

    To: Tusone

    CC: 800lbgorilla,


    Hide behind your cute messages all you want. Doesn't make any difference.

    There was literally no benefit for you guys to hit me.

    You guys made no money, no one from my family was hitting you, no one was talking shit ... and I know for a fact that you spent bought credits to build for those hits.

    You're obviously working for someone, or are just multis hiding in SM so that naps aren't broken ... either way that makes you a complete little bitch.

    Thanks for ruining the round for me. Really makes me want to continue playing and supporting the game ...










    Leave a comment:


  • 800lbgorilla
    replied
    If you had any sort of credibility I would pull out the receipts on the messages.

    Your hubris has no bounds, that self fellating excuse of an autobiography was the best blog post in months? You acting like a petulant child makes this all the sweeter.

    Leave a comment:


  • MattyCakes
    replied
    Somebody is threatening to quit supporting because they were hit?

    Clutch...say it ainít so...

    Leave a comment:


  • Lordj2017
    replied
    Originally posted by Clutch View Post
    At the end of the day, you went out of your way and used bought credits to hit someone who didnít hit you, talk shit, threaten your family, or have any cash to steal.

    If anyone finds this kind of shit funny, then youíve got the IQ of a toaster.

    Half of the messages youíre claiming here are completely fabricated ... and you troll me for writing one of the most in-depth and polished blog posts in months ... but then make a low quality thread like this, just to get a little attention.

    Enjoy your 5 minutes of fame idiots.

    Here's the thing litteraly noone enjoyed your blog we only read it to see how much shit you was gonna spew talking yourself up...
    Skidmark owned you and we all loved seeing them slaughter you

    Leave a comment:


  • iD
    replied
    Even a toaster with a 13 year badge would know that hitting for the sake of hitting and no other good reason at all is EXACTLY the kind of thing Skidmark finds funny, topped only by mocking the ensuing indignant responses and complaints.

    I can't believe you're unaware of this. You're playing your part as if you know the lines.

    Leave a comment:


  • Clutch
    replied
    At the end of the day, you went out of your way and used bought credits to hit someone who didnít hit you, talk shit, threaten your family, or have any cash to steal.

    If anyone finds this kind of shit funny, then youíve got the IQ of a toaster.

    Half of the messages youíre claiming here are completely fabricated ... and you troll me for writing one of the most in-depth and polished blog posts in months ... but then make a low quality thread like this, just to get a little attention.

    Enjoy your 5 minutes of fame idiots.

    Leave a comment:


  • SaVaGe_LulZ
    replied
    LulZ...

    Only one word to describe this.....

    EPIC............

    Leave a comment:


  • action_FKN_jackson
    replied
    now out in paperback, my new book, The Hubris of Clutch, a Study of Mediocrity

    Leave a comment:


  • braw
    replied
    Omg yous hit some ppl...wow ...amazing ...you're parents must be so proud
    Last edited by braw; 09-20-2019, 09:43 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • PBSWP
    replied
    this right here is tmb poetry..soothes the soul loll!!!

    Leave a comment:

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